Repeated unwanted pursuit
Contact and attention that keeps coming after you asked it to stop.
Educational content, written from published research and recognized domestic-violence resources. How this content is developed. MendRii is general-public educational software — not a clinical service, assessment or professional advice.
What it looks like
Calls, messages, gifts, appearances at your work or your door, messages through other people, or new accounts after you block the old ones. Framed as love, worry, or having something important to say.
Things people actually hear
- "I only came by because you didn't reply."
- "I'll stop when you talk to me."
- "I know you were out last night."
Why it works
Repeated unwanted pursuit is its own pattern, and research consistently finds it clusters around separation — the point at which access is being lost.
Responding, even to say stop again, tends to teach that persistence works. Advocates generally suggest one clear statement and then a record rather than a conversation.
A plain, dated log — date, time, what happened, any screenshots — is far easier to keep as you go than to reconstruct later, and it is useful whatever you decide to do with it.
Advocates who work specifically on stalking can help you think through documentation and options privately, before anything changes.
When it may be something else: one unwanted message, or an ex who takes a week to accept an ending, is not this. The pattern is repetition after a clear request to stop.
One way to respond
"I've asked for no contact. I'm not going to reply, and I'm keeping a record from here."
Only use a script like this if it's safe to. If pushing back has consequences for you, safety comes first — see Get help.
Educational content only. Not a diagnosis, and not legal, medical or therapeutic advice.