Find support now
You do not need to use the word “abuse” or have a plan. Confidential services also support people who are unsure.
If you are in immediate danger
Contact your local emergency number now (911 in the US, 999 in the UK, 000 in Australia, 112 across much of Europe). Do not wait for this app.
Helplines
United States
National Domestic Violence Hotline
1-800-799-7233 (or text START to 88788)
24/7, free, confidential. Interpreters available.
Visit website988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline
Call or text 988
24/7, free, confidential. For yourself, or if you are worried about someone else — including when someone is threatening to harm themselves.
Visit websiteRAINN — National Sexual Assault Hotline
1-800-656-4673
24/7, free, confidential support about sexual assault or sexual pressure, whether or not it was recent.
Visit websiteSafety Net (NNEDV) — technology safety
Online guides
Free plain-language guides on phones, location sharing, trackers and accounts when someone is monitoring you.
Visit websiteSPARC — Stalking Prevention, Awareness and Resource Center
Online resources
Free information about unwanted contact and following, and where to get local help.
Visit websiteLove Is Respect (young people, dating)
1-866-331-9474 (or text LOVEIS to 22522)
Support for teens and young adults about dating relationships.
Visit websiteUnited Kingdom
Refuge — National Domestic Abuse Helpline
0808 2000 247
24/7, free. Coercive control is a criminal offense in the UK.
Visit websiteCanada
ShelterSafe / provincial lines
See directory
Find the nearest shelter and crisis line by province.
Visit websiteAustralia
Ireland
New Zealand
Numbers change over time and this list can't cover everywhere. If one doesn't connect, search for a domestic abuse helpline in your country, or ask a doctor or pharmacist — they can point you to local services discreetly.
Practical safety planning
You do not have to be leaving. These steps can help keep your options open.
Use a device the other person can't reach
If your phone or laptop might be monitored, do your reading and any planning on a device they have no access to — a work computer, a library machine, or a trusted friend's phone.
Tell one person you trust
One outside person who knows what's happening changes a lot. It doesn't have to be family, and it doesn't have to be a decision to leave.
Know where your documents are
ID, passports, birth certificates, bank details, immigration papers, prescriptions. Knowing where they are — or keeping copies somewhere safe — keeps options open.
Keep a dated log, stored safely
Short factual notes: date, what was said or done, how you felt. Store it in a place the other person can't see, such as an account they don't know about.
Have a plan for the worst hour
If things escalate: where would you go, who would you call, what would you take, how would you get there? Deciding this calmly now is easier than deciding it in a crisis.
Talk to a specialist advocate before making moves
Advocates on the lines above do this every day. They can talk through risk, housing, children and legal options in your specific area — which this app cannot.
Documenting safely
- Write facts, not conclusions: what was said, when, who was there.
- Keep original messages where possible rather than retyping them.
- Note dates even for small things — patterns are made of small things.
- Store your log where the other person cannot find it, ideally off your main device.
- If you may take legal action, ask an advocate or lawyer early what records are actually useful in your area.
MendRii is not an evidence tool and its output is not designed for court. Whether a record helps legally depends entirely on where you live — ask an advocate or lawyer.
Why purple and teal?
Purple is the color of domestic violence awareness. It stands for the courage of people living with control, intimidation and harm inside their own homes — and for the communities that believe them.
Teal is the color of healing after loss and trauma. It stands for remembrance of those who did not survive, and for steady support for the people who carry that grief.
Woven together, these two colors are the heart of MendRii: recognition of abuse that is happening now, and hope for what comes after. They are why you see purple and teal across everything we make.
MendRii is educational software. It cannot assess your risk, and nothing on this page is legal, medical or therapeutic advice. If you want to reflect on the wider pattern, try the Relationship Pattern Check-In.